Tuesday, January 4, 2011

a fresh perspective on life

Since deciding to move across the country, far away from friends and family, work obligations, social stigmas, I've gained a new lease on life. One that allows me to decide who I want to be from here on out.
  And who do I want to be actually? A person who is dedicated to her family. A person who can make decisions that best fits her family. A person who feels unrestained from any preconceived notions about who I am. Because I AM only 30, and yeah, that's kinda old in some books. In other books, it's pretty young. To me, it means I've learned enough about myself and gained enough perspective on life to figure myself out. I've always hated winter. It's dark, it's grey, it's freaking freezing. Winter, in my eyes, is good for the best snowfall (yes, it IS beautiful!) and Christmas and New Years and all the Basch birthdays (my son's included). But it's a miserable time of year. It's depressing. In my eyes, scenery and weather has much to do with how I interpret life around me.
  So we are starting a new chapter, one that Dylan and I are both very excited about. Arizona. I'm doing as much research as possible before the move. But we still won't have all the answers. We don't REALLY know what it's like to live in Arizona, because we haven't actually lived there before. And you know what? I'm ok with that. More than ok. Besides getting married and having kids, this is the one big decision that we've made, and we made it without much discussion beforehand since we were both already thinking it. And honestly, it's the biggest one in my mind. Dylan and I getting married and having kids, between the stars and our hearts that was decided over a decade ago. This is a huge change for us, and one that we both can see only happiness.
  Yes we'll miss everyone. You can't live in Connecticut your entire life and not have issues with leaving all your friends and family behind. It makes it REALLY hard. But how would you like your life to play out...living in CT and not exploring options that you honestly believe would make you better or happier? Family and friends will be VERY VERY hard to leave. But as a family, we need to see what else is out there.
  So, it's Arizona. I hear wonderful things about Arizona. Yeah there's the heat and the desert and all that. We're willing to deal with that. I much prefer the heat to any temperature below 70 degrees.
  What will I miss? Obiviously friends and family, as stated above. Besides that, the ocean, the beach. I love the beach. I live for the few months out of the year when you can actually go. I love collecting shells and laying on the sand and building sandcastles and occasionally crawling into the icy water. My son said it best when he said "I'm a beach boy, Mama". We love the beach. But in CT, you get 3 good beach months, and 9 months of cold. I will miss the leaves changing. I will miss all the trees and the woods. I will miss snow at Christmas time, when you get it. These things, I don't think, outweigh the positives we can see in Arizona. At least that what I'm hoping.
   I want to live somewhere that's warm almost all the time, where the temperature doesn't regularly drop below 70. Somewhere where people are nice, and relaxed. Somewhere where, if I move out there and find a job bartending or waitressing, the first thought that comes into my head isn't "Omg why won't this guy order already? It's so busy" but "hey, this is a nice person to talk to" and "I'm not a psychotic New England bitch and can stop and talk to someone and enjoy myself".
  I think we'll love it. And if we don't? We'll come back. Or go somewhere else. But I think it's pretty awesome that we're willing to try

1 comment:

  1. good for you guys to go do this and follow your hearts and your ambitions. there is a huge world out there and distances can be intimidating but they aren't always something a home sick plane ride can't cure from time to time. i wish you guys the best and look forward to visiting you. ps. depending where you are in Az the beach may not be that far away, maybe you'll do weekend beach trips instead of day trips though. i have faith and confidence that you guys know what your doing and you'll make the right deciosns for yourselves and your families

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